For Billy Dale from Randy Willis

Where shall I begin? My back porch may suffice as my Annual Pickin' on Christmas Party begins. A friend and guest arrived early with a unique Christmas gift for me, her mother's homemade Twinkies made with rum.

I thanked her and thought little of the gift until another friend beside me tasted them and said, “These are mine.”

I tasted one and replied, “Oh my, not hardly.”

My “friend” took the palms of his hands and pressed them on the entire tray of Rum Twinkies. I asked, “When was the last time you washed your hands.”

“Months ago,” he replied.

“You don’t play fair,” I said, “Now I know how you won the Heisman.” I later found out he had just washed his hands.

The football player, who shall remain unnamed, for hijacking my Rum Twinkies reminded me of a trip we made to visit his mother near Tyler. "Paybacks are hell," he said.

On the way, he shared that his mother made the best hamburgers in Texas, perhaps the world. That night, she made her famed hamburgers for dinner at our request.

Early the following day, while her son slept, I told his mother, “That was the best hamburger I ever tasted. May I have the recipe?”

She smiled politely and gave me the same answer her son had the night before, “No.”

To be fair, those Twinkies were not nearly as good as those hamburgers.

I also had to ask her how the road she lived on got named after her.

She smiled and said, “One of my sons (not said football player) called her one day and said, “Mama, the County Commissioners just name the road in front of your house after you.”

“Son, they don’t need to do that. There’s a bunch of old folks out here who deserve it more than me,” she said.

Then she smiled with a sparkle in her eyes that I will never forget, “But it’s kinda nice when folks call and ask for directions. I just say, “Turn right on Ann Campbell Road. I'm on the left in my home, which my son had built for me.”

She added, “I told my children when their Daddy died, “Don’t be calling me if the county locks you up; I ain’t got any money to get you out of jail. To this day, none of my eleven children have ever been arrested.”

She was a grand lady. She reminded me of my mother, humble, wise, and proud of her kids. I was blessed to meet her and took a photo on her wall of her son that Coach Darrell Royal gave her. I've included that photo. I have never published it before.

I vote for the following names to be placed on Darrell K Royal Texas Memorial Stadium: mothers like Ann Campbell and wives like Edith Royal. But then again, I suspect there might not be enough paint.

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A week after the photos at my home I got a call from the owner of the Heisman Trophy, "I believe you have something of mine."

"Yes sir, I do, it's on my fireplace mantel. When my friends ask "What's that? and I tell them they all have the same answer, "Yeah, sure."

"I'm on the way to your office. No, I don't have any Rum Twinkies."

Randy Willis